Lies: So, John Barrowman is supposed to be a big bad villian in the second half of the currant season of Desperate housewives, a villian allegedly BASED ON the Cap'n Jack character.

Villainy: See? SEEE? Desperate Housewives is NERDY!

Villainy: And YOU didn't believe me!

Villainy: When I first told you my nerdiness theory, you scoffed! SCOFFED!

Lies: Well, you have to admit that it was a stretch!

Lies: I believed you, though.

Villainy: Harumph.

Villainy: You say that NOW, sure.

Villainy: I say again: Harumph!

Lies: <3

Villainy: With extra emphasis between "ha" and "rumph"

Lies: But I love you!

Villainy: ....*pout* I love you too.

Lies: Yay!

Lies: My roommate's cat has a mildly hilarious habit.

Lies: He will walk up to me and unerringly lick the exact location of my nipple, even when I am wearing multiple shirts and a bra.

Villainy: That's.... wow.

Villainy: Mrf. I need inspiration on my paper.

Lies: http://www.scandalouscandice.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/07/14/john_barrowman.jpg

Villainy: *snort* Not that kind of inspiration, but thank you.

Villainy: Wait! Actually! That DID help!

Villainy: Thanks, Jack!

Lies: Quick! Distract me from being snarky.

Villainy: Pickles!

Villainy: The square root of two!

Villainy: Cellular distrophy!

Villainy: Tupperware!

Lies: Woo!

Lies:  If I had a Howl-type magical door that opened to four locations, one location would be convenient to you. <3

Villainy: Awwww

Villainy: That's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me.

Lies:  My boyfriend doesn't want to see Death Race with me...

Villainy: Why do you want to see Death Race?

Lies:  The cars go BOOOOOOOOOOM.

Villainy: It looks a little cliche... I mean, "The rules are simple: There are no rules."? Really?

Villainy: I think that one and all its variations need to be officially retired from the screenwriter's arsenal, unless they're being used in irony.

Lies:  The cars go BOOOOOOM.

Villainy: You, madam, are a woman of simple tastes.

Lies:  Boom.

Villainy: Yes, dear. Boom.

Villainy: Oh, drat it, I've written myself into a corner.

Lies:  Oh?

Villainy: Yes... I inadvertantly put my last argument as the one I really don't have an answer to, so I need to rearrange my paragraphs so that one is buried in the middle, and I finish off with one that I *can* defend.

Villainy: Apparently, for me, starting a blog runs somewhere along the lines of entering an essay class.

Villainy: An essay class where you can occasionally go on a brief tangent about your breast size.